The Buffalo Theory

Otherwise known as the survival of the fittest.  And it nothing whatsoever to do with a chain of restaurants in France called Buffalo Grill.

We regularly stop off at one of the chain on the way to our hideaway because it's convenient.  They do attempt a "wild west" theme and insist (usually) on playing bad country and western music.  They are supposedly open from 11.00 (or maybe it's 11.30) until 23.00 (or maybe 23.30) but, this being France, that isn't always the case.

On the way home we used to stop off at the Calais branch before catching the train but the service there has become so lackadaisical that we have transferred our allegiance to a different eatery.

Anyway, this has nothing whatever to do with the Buffalo Theory.

It is a well-known fact that buffalo move in herds.  When a herd is panicked, the animals follow the swiftest and fittest, with the slowest, oldest beasts at the back.  It is those more decrepit animals that are caught by predators, thereby ensuring the survival of the fittest.

It is also a known fact (according to some kill-joys) that alcohol kills off brain cells.  But if we combine the two facts, we see that what alcohol does is kill off the brain cells that are already on their way out, so ensuring that the fittest brain cells survive.  It follows that the regular consumption of alcoholic beverages will ensure that the brain stays at its best by killing off the duff cells.

Will you (hic) pash the bo... bot... bottle, pleash?