Although I have owned a mobile phone for many years, I have yet to use it to send a text message. I suppose in all honesty I should admit that I rarely use it to make a phone call - and never to receive calls. In fact, the phone is rarely switched on - and we make a point of not telling people the number. I have no wish to receive a raft of calls like the one we received some years ago when we were driving to the south of France. I forget now just why the phone had been switched on: possibly I half expected a call to say that my mother had been taken ill or something along those lines. Anyway, we received several calls, all of which seemed to come from the same person. I can't be dogmatic about that as it was the Old Bat who answered as I was driving at the time. Eventually, she told the caller to delete our number as it was costing both him and us a fortune - and no, Cathy wasn't able to come to the phone and no, neither of us was going to the football that evening. I nearly flipped when the bill came and I saw what it had cost me to receive all those calls I didn't want. Nowadays I switch the phone on when we are in France - once a day, just to check. And that's about the only time I use it - to make a booking at the village restaurant if I can't face trying to track down Nicholas and, if I'm successful, get away from him in under half an hour.
As I was saying, I have never sent a text message. I've never seen the need - but that is about to change. We were told on the lookerers course on Saturday that after we have checked sheep, we should send a text message confirming all is well and advising the voltage and pulse rate of the electric fence. I told the chief honcho that I would need instruction on sending text messages, which gave rise to general laughter. Head honcho pointed out that the web site specifically says that one requirement of becoming a lookerer is sending texts. I politely corrected him and told him that the web site says it is a requirement that lookerers have mobile phones; it says nothing about sending text messages.
Yesterday, younger son and granddaughter arrived for lunch so I took the opportunity of sending him a text - just to make sure I knew what I was doing. It went very well, considering, right up until after I saw the screen saying that my message was being sent. Then the on-screen message changed to read, "Message failed". We tried all sorts to get my mobile to send a text message, to no avail.
As it happens, my mobile phone company has a shop in Brighton. I will hie me there this afternoon and no doubt some spotty-faced underage geek will give me a scornful look and sort the problem in 30 seconds flat or he will look at my ancient mobile phone and try to sell me a newer model.
This peaceful scene is a mile or so down the road from our French house.